Alright I’ve been Tik Toking a lot trying to build a brand while writing this damn book.

*I feel so fucking stupid saying that.*

So two days ago I found out my ex girlfriend HAS A FUCKING TIK TOK. Not just any account either, but one where she describes in detail how to responsibly dominate someone in bed.

When I found it I texted her and was like, “Bitch, why didn’t you tell me you had a #KinkTok?”

I now know why.

I was scrolling through today and heard her talking about how to spank.

*Lol, yep you were always good at that.*

Then I got to one about her making her sub wear toys in public.

*Lol, that’s so funny. You used to make me do that.*

Then I got to a story about how she dated someone who liked to be dominated so much she couldn’t come without her permission.

*Wait…*

She then tells this story about how her EX once “disobeyed” and she spanked her (me) so hard her ex had bruises all over her ass.

We were in a wedding that weekend and I kind of forgot about it. As I was changing someone pointed out I had “Some kind of weird rash on my backside.”

EX GF was in the room for this and basically spit out her champagne. I was mortified and quickly pulled down my dress and explained it was normal and I’d be fine. For the rest of the evening, she kept gabbing my ass when we were in dark corners and watching me cry in pain because I was so sore.

She told this story on her Tik Tok.

I think the moral of the story here is that I’m so good in bed my ex is posting about it ten years later.

Seriously though, can you imagine the audacity to anonymously post about a kinky ex partner on a public forum?

Maddening.

*I did text her and we had a good laugh about it.*